And again...

I wanted to mention again For His Glory's website. They are doing an awesome job of keeping us informed of what they are hearing and what they are doing/planning/needing.

And, we have contacted our US Senators, House Representative, the State Department, and the white house. As many other adoptive families, we are raising a plea for them to advocate for us in whatever capacity needed to get children who have families in the US home to their families so that the full orphanages may be able to care for other children desperately in need of help. I welcome others to contact their US senators/representatives, advocating for adoptive families with children in Haiti. There is also an online petition here I welcome you all to join us in signing.

I spent much of the day today reading, digesting, relaying information. I needed this. I felt like I was able to accomplish something, so that is good. I must go to work tomorrow and get some things accomplished there, so pray that I'm able to concentrate and be productive while I am there. Please keep praying with for our children and many others and about getting children home to their families.

I think that is all for now.

Updates

(read to the bottom - I've added more since originally posting)

Thank you for all your prayers. This disaster and watching/waiting for communication is consuming us. Prayers are still needed. Here's more...

• First, PLEASE contact your US Senator and Representative about approving HUMANITARIAN VISAS for adopted children in Haiti. This would allow adopted children to go home now, and make more room in orphanages for thousands of helpless "earthquake orphans". And PRAY!!! We've heard there is a special meeting regarding this issue at the US State Dept tomorrow at 10AM. We are in the process of contacting our senators/rep now.
  A couple notes about this:
  **It may be helpful to also contact the state department and possibly Bill Clinton in his role as the UN Special Envoy to Haiti, and with his non-profit organization that serves Haiti.
  **I don't know what this would mean for our adoptions if families would be able to get their kids here on a humanitarian or refugee or medical visas. I don't know if that would mean that they would become US citizens through a naturalization/citizenship process, but they would be here with their families, and it would free up the orphanage to be able to continue helping support the countless other children in Haiti who have been orphaned by this terrible disaster.
  **I haven't seen a petition letter anywhere. I've got a draft letter, but it's too long and detailed for others to use, because of the contacts we've already extablished last month when we were requesting assistance with our DNA testing issues. If I find one that would work, will post it.
  
  
• Jock is NOT planning to travel to Haiti. At least not right now. Thank you for your prayers this morning. He has spoken with the FHG director and a board member today about this and about how he can best be of assistance. More about this later from him. He'll be posting some on here - so watch the author line at the bottom of posts to see who wrote it.
  
  
• Within the last couple hours FHG heard the following from an American family living in Haiti: "We stopped by the creche on the night of the earthquake and one of the guards told us that all of the children were safe and unharmed. The wall outside of the creche was pretty severely damaged, but the building looked good. However, we did not go inside as we were in route to taking people to the hospital, so I cannot give you information about what it looked like inside. That's about all of the information I have. We are hoping to stop by the creche tomorrow if we make it down to PAP.
  

And just now from our orphanage director:

The most recent news I have: At the orphanage a wall fell. Two employees were hurt but are getting along OK. The children are all fine. Pierre was having trouble getting water but had suceeded. He got something in his right eye. He would be glad if you could let the others know.

Praise God for HIS provision for our children. Water was the thing we were worried about the most. GOD IS GOOD!

Just for your information, here are a few other places we are following updates:

• God's Littlest Angels Orphanage's website They are in the outskirts of Port-au-Prince - past Petionville in the mountains.
  
• The Livesay Family's blog and twitter page - they are in the Tabarre area of Port-au-Prince
  
• The press releases on the US State Department's website
  
• and of course the news agencies, websites, articles...
  

Updates are coming shortly

...just hold on - I can only type so fast and have gotten several emails also.

Continued Prayers Needed

We still have heard of no communication with our orphanage since 20 minutes after the earthquake hit - nothing with the aftershocks, overnight, security, building damage, water, etc. Someone posted of Facebook this morning that a missionary family reported they were safe, and we are clinging to that.

This should be the least thing on my mind with safety, health, and tragedy abounding, but I'm sick about our adoption process. Our children had adoption decrees, and have our last name. We were near the end of the process, but waiting on passports and visas. I don't know if there are copies of our dossier anywhere - at our lawyer's office or at the orphanage. Nobody has heard from our adoption lawyer in Haiti either - that we know of. He is based in the Carrefour area of Port-au-Prince, where the epicenter was.

We are going to be contacting our government representatives (house rep/senators) to see what our options are as far as humanitarian/emergency visas. I saw the MSN article about the family in Washington, but without copies of our adoption decrees, etc, I'm not sure what is even possible. We had contacted our senators/rep last month regarding the DNA testing, so we've already established that connection, so maybe that can help.

Jock is feeling God telling him to go, now. I'm struggling with this, and obviously is a prayer concern. We need to be together on this decision. Pray for God to make it clear to both of us what he is to do.

Anyway, please keep praying. Things are very stressful and scary right now. Too many questions, not enough answers.

The latest this evening

Still no communication wtih Haiti. I haven't heard if the FHG rep made it to Haiti, but if so, they have purchased a sattelite radio to take. Also, they are trying other missionaries that are communicating on the internet, as well as ham radio which apparently only works at night. Regarding adoptions:

All Haitian adoptions will be impacted by this disaster. I have received news that the JCICS and the State Department are discussing possible solutions. Please be in prayer about this.

Not much to update

For His Glory has not been able to reach the orphanage staff since about 20 minutes after the earthquake hit yesterday, so we do not know what things were like following the aftershocks, during the night and today - other than what we've heard the media report, but that does not cover the orphanage specifically. FHG has someone trying to get into Port-au-Prince to establish communication to give us more information. Until then we pray.

One of the first thoughts that came to mind when I awoke this morning was scripture from Romans 8:18-28, and am praying this today, especially verses 26-28, as my words are few:

18I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. 19The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. 20For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God.
22We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. 23Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? 25But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
26In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.
28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

(James 1:2 also came to mind, but I'm having a hard time processing that one right now.)

Here's what I know...

Our children are in Port-au-Prince, where there is extensive damage. Our ministry's (For His Glory) director spoke with the orphanage director about 20 minutes after the initial quake hit. A nanny/cook was injured when a wall fell on her and the director had an injury to his eye. All the children were OK, although I imagine quite shook up. Since that report, there hasn't been any communication from our orphanage that I'm aware of. I don't know what has gone on there during the aftershocks and overnight.

I'm following things closely, and waiting for more news, which is difficult with communication lines and power - which weren't stable to begin with - are now out. The FHG ministry, which oversees operations and funding for the orphanage is posting updates on their website (www.forhisgloryoutreach.org) as they have any information. The board is organizing response/relief efforts - there is concern for basic needs - clean water, food, medicine, shelter. There are some missionaries in Haiti, even in Port-au-Prince that do still have internet, so I am watching for communication from them as well.

It seems trivial and selfish to be concerned over our adoption process now, but of course it is on my mind as well. Our paperwork sits in a Haitian government office that is likely damaged or collapsed. This tragedy will undoubtedly slow or halt all adoption processes as the government officials work to literally dig out from the rubble and deal with the widespread devastation in the country before they resume normal operations - if normal is even now possible...

But at the forefront is the devastation, loss of life, and basic needs that were already hard to come by in Haiti - in the best of times - and now... Please continue to pray for those in Haiti, those outside Haiti affected, and those working on relief efforts. If you'd like to help, there is a link to donate online on the FHG website. Please consider a donation - large or small - the needs are great.

Haiti Earthquake

Please pray. I've just heard about a 7.0 earthquake that struck just west of Port-au-Prince, followed by several strong 5+ aftershocks. The director of For His Glory just has spoken with Pierre, the director of the orphanage:

"I spoke with Pierre and he says that a nanny/cook was injured when a wall fell on her during the earthquake. Pierre received injury to his eye. All of the children seem to be ok. I forgot to tell him that the hospital had collasped. I think he was on his way there with the nanny. Please pray for everyone in Haiti."

It's good to know that our children are safe and unharmed, but this is devestating to the country. Most buildings are built of unreinforced concrete, slums with corrugated steel, and mountainsides filled with shacks, etc. Obviously huge concern. I'm keeping my eye on the news. CNN is covering right now... Will let you know if I hear any more. Please just keep all in Haiti and those outside of Haiti affected by this in your prayers.

Update: CNN is reporting that many buildings have collapsed in Port-au-Prince - even the more (relatively) sturdy government buildings have damage if not collapsed. And some photos from our previous trips to give you an idea of the buildings that are in Haiti - notice the construction materials and also how the houses are built on the mountainsides.

In the Port-au-Prince slums along the bay - either Cite Soliel or La Saline - houses made of corrugated steele - not even concrete block in some of these areas:









The hillside view from the hotel we've stayed at - in the Delmas area of Port-au-Prince:









Driving through Petionville into the Mountains East of Port-au-Prince:









The countryside view from the Baptist Mission's cafe:









Government buildings in downtown Port-au-Prince:

Attachment Parenting

When people talk about adoption, attachment disorders often come up. Many people don't understand it. I cannot say that I fully understand it either, but I have learned a lot over the last almost-4 years. I thought I would share some things that could help others who might be working through attachment issues. I'm not looking for pity or criticism or even to share the intimate details of what's been going on in our house recently (I'll be vague to protect the privacy of our family). But rather, in the hopes of knowledge-sharing.

We have known for a while that we are dealing with some issues relating to attachment disorder. We do not see all the textbook signs/symptoms - but some. And, the issues we deal with are not severe in nature, but there are definitely ways we have to parent differently than a parent not dealing with attachment disorders would.

We have rarely been criticized openly regarding our parenting, but it has happened. We also sometimes feel judgement (stares, silence, etc.) regarding some of the parenting techniques we use. It's hard - really hard - to feel the judgement and criticism, especially from people who know little about adoption parenting, and those who do not know our family well.

Yes, there are many times we screw up. We say and do things that don't work or make things more difficult than they already are. WE are probably the harshest critics of our own parenting. When things don't work, we question whether we're doing the right thing or if we've just made things worse.

Another adoptive mom posted a list of things that others (and ourselves!) have thought or said with regard to attachment parenting. The ones that get me the most are, "They are so controlling", and "Oh, all children do that!" These comments are hard to combat. Unless you know a child intimately who has attachment issues, you cannot truly understand. As a parent, you just know that you're dealing with something different than typical childhood behaviors - it simply cannot always be explained.

We had a good deal of time the last several months where things were going quite well. The things we've been doing were really taking hold. Attitudes and behaviors improved, and connections were being made... Then the winter weather and the holidays came around. We probably loosened the reigns and let our guard down after the good times. We let go of some of our routines. We allowed more freedoms than we normally would... Things all came tumbling down.

We've been working through some tough emotions and behaviors lately. We've had to re-implement some strict boundaries and reset stricter limits on certain things. We've had many heart-to-heart conversations. We've added lots of extra devoted time. It seems to be helping.

I've been doing some research online recently for some attachment-building activities to do together when we're having hard days, but found much more information than I thought I was looking for. This website describes some basics about what sorts of signs/symptoms make up attachment disorders. Another website I found contains a wealth of suggestions for parenting a child with attachment disorder. I'm trying to implement some of these techniques as well.

We are having to take time out of other activities we'd rather be doing to work through this stuff. It is embarrasing, especially at the most inconvenient times, but it's what we have to do. And while we do, we are so thankful to our friends and family for being so supportive and allowing us the freedom, without criticism, to parent as we feel appropriate.

Please pray that we can continue to work through these issues, that our family can grow healthier attitudes, behaviors, and relationships. We are believing that God will help us become all the stronger as we work through this together.

My Hopes and Goals for 2010

I don’t typically make New Year’s resolutions, because they’re such cliché. I do have some hopes and also some goals, I just don’t call them resolutions.

My biggest hope for the new year is for our Elijah & Josephine to come home. It will happen, and we’re praying all goes smoothly this next couple of months to make that happen sooner rather than later. It gives me such joy to think about them being here with us!

Of course, like most women I want to lose weight. I have a goal in mind that I won’t share here, but it all revolves around continuing to exercise more and eat healthier. This is something I did really well last spring/summer, but stopped with my shin splints in the fall. I have many options now for exercise (treadmill, Wii Fit Plus, walking with a friend), so I shouldn’t get bored and quit. I also try to always eat healthy – and for the most part I’ve been eating lots more fruits and vegetables in the last several months, so I want to keep that up.

I want to continue working hard on my relationships – first and foremost with my husband and my children. Not that there are glaring issues, but it’s the little things that count, and I need to focus on those things that really make a difference in our family. My marriage has held through some tough times, and is all the stronger for it, and I want to continue to make this a top priority. Kaylen and I have struggled with our relationship, partly due to her past, details of which I will not go into here. But I’ve worked hard to move beyond those issues. Things have improved greatly over the last year, and I want that to continue.

And last but most certainly not least, I need to make God my top priority. Last year at this time, I made an effort to spend more time in the Word and in prayer. I continued this throughout the year – although at some times I did better than others – and it really paid off in other areas of my life. Taking that time out of my busy schedule, away from the busy-ness of life, really makes a huge impact. “For nothing is impossible with God” (Luke 1:37), and “Apart from HIM, I can do nothing.” (John 15:5).