Adoption Update

Well, it’s been a while since I’ve updated on our adoption process. A lot has happened since then, so I decided I couldn't wait until after a referral to share where we were adopting from.

We are adopting again from Haiti. I think Haiti has been on our hearts all along, but we were discouraged early this year regarding Haiti's 2-child limit. We looked at a couple other countries, but they just didn't seem right - our hearts were still in Haiti. We were not comfortable adopting if this law was still in place – knowing how long so many families had waited in process before the earthquake to get approval if they needed presidential dispensation because they did not meet the letter of the 1974 adoption law.

We’d followed lots of orphanages in Haiti during and after our adoption of Elijah & Josephine, and decided we wanted to adopt from Gods Littlest Angels orphanage. In May, when I stated the doors opened to us, was when GLA announced they would allow families who had more than 2 children to adopt. Apparently they’d heard from other orphanages in Haiti that presidential dispensations were not an issue any longer – and larger families were being approved in short order as well. I was very excited when I read that email, and we immediately began our paperwork journey... And quite a journey it’s been!

In early July, we had our homestudy visits and most of our other dossier paperwork completed, when Haiti’s president made a statement that he would no longer allow families to do independent (without an agency) adoptions. We’d planned to adopt independently again, just as we’d done for Elijah & Josephine’s adoption. But this was no longer an option. We thought we were within a couple weeks of completing our dossier and mailing it to Haiti, but this caused us some delay.

We looked into the possibility of using just our home study preparer’s agency for oversight, but within a couple weeks, got information that this was not going to be sufficient, per Dixie’s (GLA director’s) blog that, “All adoptive families must use a licensed agency who will have direct contact with the orphanages,” and from GLA’s US adoption coordinator, that “President Martelly doesn't want (orphanages) to have contact with the families until the child is proposed.” So that means we need an agency to be our primary child placement agency, not just oversight for our homestudy and post placement visits.

So we contacted a few agencies that already have a relationship with GLA. Two responded with similar responses. One was a Hague accredited agency, and the other was not. We decided, since Haiti is moving towards Hague ratification, that we’d be safer with the Hague agency, so we decided to go with Bethany Christian Services International. We agreed to continue to put together our dossier on our own (it was nearly completed anyway), and they’d reduce their fees since we would only be working with their international headquarters office in Michigan.

We had LOTS of paperwork to sort through, and it became quite stressful and frustrating. At the height of the stress and frustration, we were told that they would not accept our homestudy, as it was not completed by a licensed agency. It was completed by an independent social worker, licensed to do homestudies in the state of Iowa, but that wasn’t enough. So we also had to sign on with her agency to provide oversight for her home study, and also for the post placement reports we will have to complete after our child comes home. Yes, more fees and paperwork!

Now, more than a month after we were asked to sign on with an agency, I think we are finally moving forward again. We’d already had our entire dossier authenticated, translated, and legalized by the consulate, but our homestudy is being reprinted on agency letterhead, so we’ll have to redo that piece, which will likely take another couple weeks. We’re hoping to have our dossier mailed to Haiti by the end of this month. Also, we have some online training we’ll have to complete in that time too.

Our specific prayer requests now, as we proceed with this adoption process, are that no more surprises come up with the agency adoption, and for the remainder of the paperwork and dossier creation to go smoothly. We’re praying that we’ll be matched with the child God has chosen for our family. Someone encouraged me during the stressful agency sign-on process these last six weeks, that perhaps this delay was helping us get matched with just the right child.

We’re also praying that the Haitian adoption process continues to move along smoothly. For those of you that are familiar with the Haitian adoption process, we’re hearing from a few families we know of that are ahead of us in process, that IBESR approval is taking around 2½ - 4 months (even for families needing presidential dispensation), parquet 3-4 months. Those are the two that took a LONG time when we were in process with Elijah & Josephine. I haven’t heard much about Courts/Judgement or MOI yet. Please pray for our friends and soon to be us in process. We’ll update more after our dossier arrives in Haiti and we get our referral to start the process.

Fun Summer Pix

Waiting for the parade to begin.They love it when Daddy turns on the sprinkler system. Great activity for a hot summer day!Pepperoni Pizza when they were learning the letter "P".Kaylen played a few tournaments with her soccer team this summer.

Today

Well, today didn't go quite like we'd expected, but we got a lot done.

I woke up to an email in my inbox from our translator. I then proceeded to print our translations - making a quick trip to the store to get more paper in the middle.

The kids did an awesome job with their cleaning jobs. The little kids are so funny - they have no idea what they're doing, but they're eager to help so we let them loose. I think the hardwood floor got mostly clean, as well as the half-bath bathroom mirrors, counters and floors. Kaylen swept and did the upstairs bathroom. Josephine dusted the stairway railing. The garbage cans are all emptied, the upstairs got vacuumed, and the shoes in the entryway got tidied up and swept under.

When they were almost finished with their jobs, I had all the dossier documents ready to Express-Mail to the consulate and to our agency. So I gathered a treat for the kids to reward them their tough work, and we headed to the bank to get a money order. The bank had popcorn today, so I replenished their empty Peanut M&M bowls with popcorn after the bank. Then we went to the post office.

After the post office, we stopped at the library to return and check out new books. Kaylen had finished her last library book on Thursday and had one on hold that had come in. She checked out a total of 8 books - but had one already read before we left the library. I hope she's set for books now until school starts again in two weeks. I picked out "V", "W", "X", "Y", and "Z" books for Elijah and Josephine. We started the letter "V" today (more on that later), and we should have the rest of the alphabet finished next week!

We got home from the library around 12:30, had a quick lunch and got the little kids down for their naps. I started laundry, Kaylen finished a couple chores that needed fixed (she likes to try to get away with doing things as quickly as possible). Then she played Wii until E&J woke up, while I sorted a few months worth of paperwork (you know - junk mail, kids' art pages, notes from daycare, coupons, etc.). When the little kids woke up, all three kids put on their swimsuits to play in the backyard mini-blow-up-pool and sprinklers until suppertime. I got the old net removed from the trampoline while they were playing out side. We were hoping to have the replacement net installed this weekend - but we realized the poles holding it up were damaged, so we have to order the replacement poles now too! Ugh.

After supper, I made milk shakes for dessert while the kids showered. We then read a couple "V" books. After the kids went to bed, I finished sorting adoption paperwork and receipts, cleaned out my purse, and caught up with some friends on Facebook while sort-of listening/watching TV.

Jock had a busy day as well. He cleaned the refrigerator while supervising the kids' jobs, worked on moving some more rock from the pile in our driveway to the landscaping beds, trimmed the lawn (he mowed Thursday evening), weeded the garden, got a few groceries, grilled supper, helped the little kids shower, then collapsed in his recliner with his laptop and a computer game. Yes, he's AWESOME!!!

I'm happy with all we got done - especially that the house is in much cleaner order! We didn't all get naps in (only E&J did), but tomorrow's another day. Hmmmm...

Time?

Does anyone have any? Seriously, where does the time go?!? It's in short supply around here, so I'm just going to do some brief bullet-point updates.

• I can't believe it is nearly August already! Kaylen has just two weeks before school starts! Which means we better get working on gathering those school supplies soon, huh?! I think we have a bunch she can use for this coming year, but need to check inventory with the supply list and get what we don't already have.
  
  
• Kaylen has two slightly-loose teeth. I didn't think she was supposed to lose any more yet. And they're the canines that are lose, not the molars which I thought were next. She did say that they hurt. In the past she's typically tried to wiggle them like crazy at the first sign of a loose tooth, so maybe she bumped one and just is trying too hard now. Hmmmm...
  
  
• I hate to say it again, but we're still "almost done" with our dossier for our next adoption. I'd hoped to have it all legalized and back from the consulate by now, but it's been with the translator for over a week. She says she normally takes a few days, but she just returned from an overseas trip and then had a nasty storm that damaged some of their property and left them with intermittent power. New goal: hoping we'll have it completely done and ready to send August 8th.
  
  
• VBS was this week at our church - Sunday through Thursday evenings. I was helping, and all three kids were attending, which meant we had to race home, throw some food down our throats, and get to church by 5:45 - which meant that my one slow eater had to finish dinner at breakfast every day this week. What?! You mean cucumbers or green beans are not a good breakfast?!
  
  We're all exhausted after being up past our bedtimes the past five nights. Josephine fell asleep on the way home from VBS last night - must have fallen asleep in the first 2 minutes in the car. We decided to go out for dinner tonight, because neither Jock nor I wanted to cook and we were out of leftovers. Elijah & Josephine were both pretty droopy-eyed in the car and at the restaurant. But we all had a lot of fun too! Elijah asked on the way home, as we passed by the church if we could go tonight, and was sad that he had to wait until Sunday. All three kids have been asking every time we get in the car if we can listen to the VBS songs. Pandamania was so much fun!
  
  
• My sister hasn't had her baby yet, so I think we're going to just stick around home. This place needs some major cleaning and organizing! I'm sure a stop at the library is in order, as we probably have books coming due, and we had one on hold that's come in. We'll probably try to get back to the letter-learning with the preschoolers - "V" is next. The landscaping project we were working will probably resume - I'll have to post photos soon - some of the rock is in, and it looks awesome!!! And yup, some more adoption paperwork stuff to do for our agency. Jock probably wants to also work some more on the swing set, but I think we're getting a little ambitious considering how tired we all are tonight. I definitely think naps for all are in store for tomorrow. :)

Random Thoughts

• Kaylen's always got her nose in a book these days. Her last trip to the library she discovered the "Boys Against Girls" series by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor. She's read two of them this week so far. Excellent!
  
  ...Except for the fact that she stayed up reading an hour past her lights-out time. We're keeping track of her reading time and what books she reads for a summer reading program chart she will to return to school this fall for prizes. The next day when I wrote down her book and minutes, it looked like she'd finished a book in about 20 minutes. Ummmm.... "What time did you turn off your lamp last night?" "Um, I don't know, 8:06." "Really? How did you finish that book in only 20 minutes?" "Oh, um, I guess it was 8:11." Right. Well, the lamp has been unplugged until trust has been earned back.
  
  
• Elijah has his good days and his bad days. Apparently Thursday he got caught hitting a friend outside for recess and got sent to the picnic table to sit down for a bit. I assume maybe he didn't want to go, so was excorted to the picnic table where he may have proceeded to throw a fit and hit the teacher who was trying to get him to sit down. I just got a note, so no chance to ask questions, but it then said that the teacher had to get an ice back due to bleeding. Hmmmm... No, you will not be watching television or getting dessert tonight for injuring your teacher. I think a talk with his teachers and/or the daycare director is in store for us. I don't understand why he has such misbehavior there. I think it might be a personality issue with the teacher. It's no excuse for his behavior, but don't they also need to know how to reach the child on his level/personality too? Later he told us that he didn't get to watch a movie when all the other kids did - not sure about that. I hope to talk to the teachers again Monday.
  
  
• Josephine has been doing a good job with her glasses - it's been over a week now, and no issues so far. She's mostly leaving them on her face except for sleeping and showers. I caught her one time trying to put them on the floor to try to get her shirt off quick. I stopped that one right away with, "Don't you ever put your glasses on the floor." I think it worked. She did chew on one of the bows one of the first days she had them. I asked her where she was when she did it, she said, "At daycare, under the table." I made it clear that wasn't allowed - they have to stay on her face.
  
  
• Jock's work is VERY busy right now - has been for over a month. And when I say VERY busy, that's an understatement. Don't know if it's unrealistic expectations on his or someone else's part, but he's very stressed out, and some days it carries over to when he gets home. Not fun. :( Hope it lets up soon.
  
  
• I'm fairly busy at work myself, but it's not all that stressful, just busy. It's because the main project I work on is a 3-year contract, and the current contract is up July 31, and the new one starts August 1. It's so different and fun and interesting, but a lot of work to get the data calculations, tracking systems, etc., up and running to support the new contract.
  
  
• Our adoption paperwork is almost done. It's being translated now. Should have it ready to send off for a referral by the end of the month. Had hoped by mid-month, but it wasn't to be. We'll get there.
  
  
• Kaylen's playing in a soccer tournament again this weekend. It's four games today - YIKES!!! Then possibly two on Sunday, but she won't make the first of those two because it conflicts with church. Good thing it's in town! I was thinking it'd be better weather than last weekend, but now I see that the excessive heat warning is in place again, and a chance of a thunder shower. Yuk!
  
  
• Also this weekend, Jock and Elijah are off hunting for landscaping rock, and a new lawn mower - ours died last night in the middle of mowing the back yard. At least he got the front done! :) That mower was a hand-me-down, and we got every last ounce of life out of that thing the last 9 years.
  
  
• This coming week we'll be busy with VBS at our church. I'm helping and all three kids will be attending. Because of that we'll be taking a hiaitus from the letter-learning. We'll start on V next Friday, and should finish the alphabet and have a couple days for review the week before school starts.
  
  
• I can't wait until my sister has her baby. We'll probably make a quick weekend trip to see them when she does. Can't wait to meet my newest little neice or nephew. :)
  
  
• I'm also looking forward to a weekend coming up to go shopping with some girlfriends. We're all leaving our husbands home with our kids Saturday morning and going to the Mall of America, staying overnight, some more shopping Sunday before we head home. Maybe we'll even have time for a stop at Ikea. I've never been and don't really know what all the hype is, but it should be a fun weekend!
  
  
• School will be starting in three weeks. I can't believe how fast this summer has gone! I also can't believe how early our district starts! Kaylen's excited to see who her teacher will be. Lists should be posted August 1. She wants to go look that day to see who will be in her class. I remember the days - so fun to see if you got the teacher you wanted.

"S", "T", "U"

We Started the letter "S" today, on Sunday. We talked about all the fun Summer things we like to do, like putting our Swimsuits on and running through the Sprinklers or going Swimming. We like to eat Strawberries and Salads and other fresh veggies from the garden like Squash. We eat Sandwiches a lot too. We also like to be Silly, but Stop when it gets to be too much for one kid, especially the tickling. :)

Elijah and Josephine started their coloring page for the letter S, and we'll do the letter-writing practice page tomorrow. We have checked books out from the library titled, "The Seven Sneezes", "Spring Snowman", and "I am too absolutely Small for School".

Tuesday, we'll start on the letter "T". (Isn't that convenient?! I didn't plan it that way - it just worked out that way. :) They'll do the two pages - coloring and letter-writing. We'll likely have turkey burgers with tomatoes and provolone. We'll read books titled, "Tick-Tock", "Two by Two by Two", and "Teeny Tiny Ernest".

We'll have to get really creative with the letter "U". Not so much for the books, but for the food. We're planning on eating our supper Under the table instead of sitting in our chairs at the table. (Of course, one of the kids will have to sweep Under the table first. :) We checked out books from the library titled, "Under the Snow", "The Umbrella Day", and "When I Grow Up".

What's Your Blog?

I like reading other people's blogs. But frankly I haven't had a lot of time to do so. After I get home from work, pick up kids, fix/eat supper, run one kid to soccer practice, try to accomplish a little letter-learning from the other two, make sure the kids (and their clothes for the next day) are clean, and they get to bed.

Then for the next hour, I have to get some things accomplished, like spending time with my husband, checking on the status of our adoption paperwork, making sure one kids' school paperwork has been sent to the school district, making sure bills get paid, preparing lunch(es) for the next day, returning a few emails or phone calls, checking up on my family/friends on Facebook, etc., etc., etc... but by 9(ish) pm, it's MY bedtime.

On weekdays, I get up early - at 4:45 am - so I can grab a quick bite of energy and get to the gym for my 5:15 class. I'm home by 6:15, then it's a race to get everyone breakfast, get my shower, and get out the door by 7 am. I typically work until 4, then it's back to the evening rat-race at home.

I do a little blog-reading on the weekends, or on the rare evening when time allows. So for when I do have time to do a little leisure reading...

Please share with me what your blog addresses are. I'd love to expand my list.

J's New Look!

When Elijah and Josephine had their well-child visit this spring, they tried to check their eyes. The pediatric eye chart has an upper-case E and it points different directions, to a different thing on each side or top/bottom, like a bunny, clown, etc. In my mind, they're outdated charts. They had no idea what those pictures were, and had no idea what the nurse meant when she asked what the E was pointing towards. So they couldn't check their eyes. The doctor recommended we go see a pediatric opthalmologist, in case they have lazy eyes, or need glasses, etc. Best to treat that sort of thing before they need to use their eyes for school.

Since then, we'd been noticing, while practicing our letters this summer, that Josephine really squints and has to get up real close to a book (like 3 inches away) to look for letters. Our concerns were confirmed at the eye doctor's office this week. She needs glasses. But the doc said that she shouldn't need them permanently, it's due to lazy-eye, and should correct with glasses.

That day after we left the clinic, we had to stop at Walmart to pick up a few groceries. I had her try on a few pair just to see what they had, the cost, etc. She was very excited to try them all out. She was sitting in the cart, and I'd put a pair on her and wheel her to look in the mirror and she'd start diva-dancing in her seat in the cart. Very cute! She's very excited. (I wonder how excited she'll be when she realizes she has to wear them all the time. I was always annoyed by mine starting when I got them in the 2nd grade.)

Elijah, on the other hand, was very sad and dejected when I told him that he didn't need glasses. He sat in the cart with his face down and pouting the rest of the grocery trip. Poor guy. I had to talk to him and explain that his eyes are really good and he doesn't need them, but Josephine can't see very well and needs extra help. I don't think he gets it - thinks it's totally unfair that J gets glasses and he doesn't, but he'll be OK. We left him to have fun with Dad on the final glasses-shopping outing.

So then we had the fun of trying to find just the right pair. My criteria: cute, but sturdy and with a warranty, because she is only 4 years old, after all. Josephine's criteria: pink (it's her favorite!). Although, given the fun she had while trying them on, I think she'd be happy with just about any color (as long as it was fairly girly). Her nose is flat and wide at the top though, so the sturdiest of frames don't fit her face right. So we had to go with ones with the little bendy nose pieces. That made it a little more difficult, but I think we ended up with some cute ones.

We just got them tonight. At first she was lifting her chin way up so she could see under them. I told her she has to look through them, not turn her head like that, so she got used to that. She left them on too. I told her she has to wear them except for when she sleeps or takes a shower. We also got two cases - one for at home, and one for her to leave at daycare to keep them safe when she takes her nap there. She thought that was pretty cool, then started naming all the people she wants to tell that she got new "sunglasses". (Yah, we're wroking on calling them "glasses" instead of "sunglasses".)

She loves them because they're pink. (Don't tell her they're really purple! The bows are darker purple around her ears, but very light in the front, so we're calling them pink with a little bit of purple.) What do you think?I think that they make her look older though - the only thing I don't like about them. But, stinkin' cute, right?! :)

"Q" and "R"

This week we only have M-Th because at least two of us, if not all 5 of us, will be in Ames for Kaylen's soccer tournament (Iowa Games) Friday and Saturday. So we have two days each for "Q" and "R".

We did "Q" Monday and Tuesday. Monday night I made Quiche for supper. I thought about making Quesedillas too, but not enough time to make a meal last night, so we just had left-overs. I also wanted to go to Dairy Queen, but that didn't happen either. We did get our coloring/letter-writing practice pages done, and read a few books: "Quiet in the Garden", "Quilt Counting", and "The Pirate Queen". (I don't recommend that last one unless your kids are older or have a much higher interest/understanding level - we just sort of skipped through it quickly and looked at the pictures.)

The kids did well with recognizing the upper-case "Q", but they have trouble with the lower-case "q". They are getting it confused with "b", "d", and "p". I suppose a normal thing for their age and for first learning their letters. We'll maybe work on these some more after we finish the rest of the alphabet.

Tonight when we got home, Elijah & Josephine colored their "R" pages, while I made Ravioli for supper. After supper, we backed up a letter, and headed to Dairy Queen for dessert. The kids had each earned four treats, from reading 20 books each during the library's summer reading program. We got out the treat cards, and looked for the "Q" on the Dairy Queen logo, and the "R"s from the "Read" stamps that the librarian and put on their cards when they earned each treat. Then headed over to DQ. We actually got 2 medium blizzards, 2 small cones, and a dilly bar, all for the price of one medium blizzard! (I had a BOGO coupon as well.) Mmmmmmm!!!

Tomorrow we'll finish the letter "R" with the letter-writing practice page. We'll also read a book about Rain and one about a Rhinoceros. Should be fun! Then next week we'll start "S" on Sunday.

Side Bar Update/Announcement

I've Updated my sidebar, so go over to the left and take a look!

Yes, you'll notice our news: We're starting another adoption!!!

We're not ready to share a lot of details yet, other than what's already on the sidebar. We knew our family was not complete when Elijah & Josephine came home, but we all needed time to adjust to life in a family of 5 before we started thinking about another adoption.

Around January, we started looking into adoption - domestic, foster-adopt, international (various countries). After a little research and a lot of prayer, we felt we sort of knew what direction we needed to go, but it didn't seem quite right. At that point it seemed like God was telling us it just wasn't time yet.

Over the next few months, we were wrestling with the direction that we felt God was calling us: not knowing if it was possible, wondering if we had some specifics wrong, or if we were still just to keep waiting and praying for the specifics to become clear.

In May, as we waited and continued praying, we started to see some doors opening. We began praying more specifically that the door we felt was our direction would swing wide open. That happened on May 18/19. We immediately jumped at the open door and submitted our application the following Monday. We received notice that our application had been accepted two days later. :)

So what's next? We're working on our homestudy and other documents that will be included in our dossier.

We hope to have our dossier completed and mailed by mid-July. It's a lofty goal, but so far it seems to be going more quickly this time, since we already (mostly) know from previous experience where to go and who to call for the various documents we need.

Once our dossier is finalized and mailed, we should receive a referral fairly quickly (although we don't know if that'll be a couple weeks or a couple months). When we accept a referral, then we'll be willing to share more information publicly about the whos/whats/wheres, etc.

In the meantime, please pray that our dossier completion goes smoothly. We know this is all happening in God's timing, and He has already prepared our child for our referral and subsequent adoption. We're praying for the referral process, and also for the entire adoption process.