This week has been tough. Tuesday we got our monthly process update, and basically there was no news. We are still in IBESR. This frustrates me and discourages me. I was at work, and had to go to the bathroom and pray and cry for a bit. However, it wasn't like a normal prayer - more pleading and begging involved. I'm just sad and angry and sick about it. I haven't really gotten much beyond it - but at least to the point of being able to post about it now. It's been over 6 months now since we entered IBESR, and we were told it would be 4-7 months. I suppose we're still in that timeframe, but I was under the impression that things were moving more quickly than that now.
Friday night we went to our friends' church. These friends of ours have been such a blessing to us, as they are also adopting, three children, from the same orphanage. They were about at the same point as us in their processing, so we've been going through this together. Several of their church members gathered to pray for our adoption processing, and it was such a wonderful experience. I mostly cried, praying quietly while they prayed aloud for both us families that were present, as well as many others who weren't. We also fasted that day, and prayed in petition to God for our process. It was avery powerful day/evening, and such a blessing to me.
I'm still in that discouraged, frustrated, sad place, but this morning in church was also good. We've been going through the book of Isaiah since January. This week focused on Isaiah 36-39, where King Hezekiah is praying through three crises he was going through. Our pastor's message was on prayer, and it really spoke to my hurting heart today. A few key points and supporting scripture verses:
- God hears the prayer that expresses dependence on His character - start our prayers with who God is, not what we want. (Isaiah 37:14-21, Luke 11:2)
- God hears the prayer that expresses obedience to His commands. (Isaiah 38:2-6, Psalm 66: 18-19, 1John 1:7-9, James 5:13-16)
- God makes no promises to hear us when we express pride and self-reliance. (Isaiah 39, 1John 5:14-15)
The praise band also sang a song that I've heard once or twice before, that I just love. The gal who led it has a beautiful voice, and it makes it even more meaningful. I cried most of the way through it today. It perfectly fit what I've been going through this week. Here are the lyrics below. I found a version of it and put it on my playlist so you can hear what it sounds like, but it's not as good as Patty and our church's praise band singing it...
Hungry I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty
But I know Your love does not run dry
And I wait
And I wait
So I wait for You
So I wait for You
I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus You're all this heart is living for
Broken I run to You
For Your arms are open wide
I am weary but I know Your touch restores my life
So I wait for You
So I wait for You
Lyrics of "Hungry (Falling on My Knees)" by Kara Williamson
I hesitate posting this even now, because I don't want people to take this the wrong way. I still believe with all my heart that Elijah and Josephine are two children that God has created and chosen for our family. However long and hard this process is, we will persevere through however long it takes to bring them home.Please continue praying for our adoption processing, and for strength through this journey. May our papers move along through the process quickly, and may we give the glory to God when good news comes our way!
Praise God - Jen & Bryan's papers have gotten IBESR approval - they found out of their approval a few hours before we got together to pray on Friday. We're so excited for them to be on to their next step! A few others also have gotten good news (no others from IBESR that we know of, but from other steps in the process).
7 comments:
Hi Lisa and Jock-
We feel your pain and are continuing to fervently pray. We have been in IBESR for almost 8 months. God has taken us to the book of Job and is teaching us much. May you find continue to find strength in Him -- and for me, somedays are easier than others, but at least He remains the same.
Keep pressing on-
Hi Lisa, We've been in IBESR for
7+ months. I'm encourage that another couple from our Orphanage got approval...hang in there. Our time is coming soon! And so much takes place in our hearts and our relationship with Jesus while we wait. I haven't heard the song "Hungry" in a long time...
Terry
Sorry you are in such pain. I know our hearts were completely devasted after dealing with FHG and Haiti. I will be praying for a miracle for you and your babies.
Major Mom - I'm sorry for your devastation after deciding not to continue with FHG and adopting from Haiti. I pray for your hearts to heal. It is a hard process, but in my opinion and (however somewhat limited) experience, any adoption - especially international - has the potential to be very difficult. However, I know this is where God has called us to be, and we are following His leading. For His Glory, Maison des Enfants de Dieu, the process, and all people involved, have been a blessing to us in many ways.
Thanks Julie & Terry for your thoughts and prayers and kind words. Know your processes are and will continue to be in our prayers as we persevere. It's been a while since I've read Job - will have to take another look. It's always interesting how much you get out of a book another time just from the perspectives of your current circumstances.
We have to go through several channels to receive news now and I was given misinformation Sunday that we were out. I found out today that wasn't true. I'm bummed with you guys that we're all not out yet. I keep telling myself that it's in God's hand and in His timing. There's a reason we all have to wait. I know it's still difficult, but we need to hang onto His promises. Love you guys!
I share your feelings. It's been over 7 mo and I was hoping to be through parquet by now!! It's hard not to be discouraged.
How does on explain what happened tp us when we decided to continue even after being decieved?
Major Mom, what happened to you was not your fault. Many HUGS.
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