"What about me?"

OK - I know this is long, but please bear with me. The last several weeks I've had a certain thought going through my head, that's really bothered me, but that I'm really passionate about. It stems from a conversation I had quite a while back with several adults. I've had this conversation come up in the past, but not to this extent. This time, the path it led down really got me thinking...

Many times in the past, we've gotten the question, "Why do you want to adopt from Haiti? Why Haiti, when there are so many children in need much closer to home?" I have many answers to that question: poverty/need/desperation, adoption criteria, cost, God's calling. Most times people understand, and don't further question our motives. This time they did not. I had to completely remove myself from the conversation to keep sane. Jock continued the conversation, but I honestly don't have such a good recollection of it, since I was going through in my mind some rationale, and in part, trying to ignore what was being said, because I was fuming inside. I'm not a good on-the-spot thinker or speaker, and this one really got to me, so it's taken me several weeks to even get some thoughts straightened out and down on paper.

Anyway, to set this up a bit more, the conversation went one step further from, "Why are we adopting from Haiti"?, to "Why are we supporting and in turn helping to fund-raise and attempt to draw further support for the orphanage in Haiti?" That's fine - I don't take it too personal when people question our motives. However, then it then progressed to, "Why don't we help those closer to home, before we start sending money to Haiti", which then led, more specifically, to "Why don't we help those in our family first?", and "What about me? I am having trouble supporting my family."

Wow! What do you say to that?

Before you answer, here is some perspective: I don't think anyone in that building while this conversation was going on (with the possible exception of one person's experiences early in life), has ever experienced long-term, not having food to eat or so little food that there was a real fear of starvation, not having clean water coming out of their faucets, not being able to send their children to school, fearing for their life because they could not access emergency medical care, not having a roof over their head, not being able to find a job (even as a McDonald's cashier or burger-flipper if they were really desperate).

The person who made the comment is a stay-at-home parent to two children who both attend school at least part-time. One of the children regularly uses a nebulizer and medications to treat asthma and allergy symptoms. That, in addition to the fact that American schools require certain immunizations and a physical before attendance into school is granted, tells me that they do obtain regular medical care. The last time I saw them, they were well-dressed, they were not so thin that their skin was hanging off their bones, and the family lives in a residence that is well-furnished with chairs, beds, toys, games, etc, and where they also have running water.

Now, you may rebut with, "well, that doesn't mean that they're not struggling financially." That is true, but suffice it to say, that they are not struggling anywhere close to the level of which many in Haiti struggle. Many Americans struggle with debt. They purchase beyond their means, against future income. We do it too, although we try to keep it under wraps and within a budget. In Haiti, this is not an option. Haiti is largely a cash society; credit is something little heard of. They struggle to make it from one week to the next. Not paying is not an option - they pay before they gain access to services or before they take goods home with them.

These things - literally starving to death from no food to eat, no job to be found, no clean water to drink, no school to send children to, no emergency medical care without payment first, no roof over their head, etc - these things are commonplace in Haiti. For example:

• Water: “According to a 2004 study by the Pan American Health organization, less than half the population has access to potable water and less than one-third in some rural areas. 20% of the 38,000 deaths of children under the age five are a result of diarrhea from contaminated drinking water. A majority of the health problems in Haiti are caused by lack of clean water and malnutrition. … the parasites from contaminated drinking water breed inside the intestinal tract, robbing a person of the nutrition and strength he or she needs to develop a healthy body.” ¹
  
  Most city buildings have a holding tank on their roofs, and water is purchased and trucked in and pumped up into the tank. At the orphanage where our children reside, this water is used for cleaning, bathing, and flushing toilets. Separate water is trucked in for drinking and cooking. In the country, people walk down mountains to fill their water jugs in a filthy stream, which no doubt has long been contaminated with human waste.

• Employment: There is widespread unemployment and underemployment in Haiti, with more than 2/3 of the population not having formal jobs.² Haiti is the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere with 80% of the population living under the poverty line, and 54% living in abject poverty.³

• Food: I'm not talking wine and caviar here - I'm talking the basics - rice & beans. I've seen numerous children with their hair turning orange and falling out from poor nutrition, children who's skin sags off their bodies - literally skin and bones! “At the market in the La Saline slum, two cups of rice now sell for 60 cents, up 10 cents from December and 50 percent from a year ago. Beans, condensed milk and fruit have gone up at a similar rate, and even the price of the edible clay has risen over the past year by almost $1.50. Dirt to make 100 cookies now costs $5, the cookie makers say. Still, at about 5 cents apiece, the cookies are a bargain compared to food staples. About 80 percent of people in Haiti live on less than $2 a day.
  
  "A reporter sampling a cookie found that it had a smooth consistency and sucked all the moisture out of the mouth as soon as it touched the tongue. For hours, an unpleasant taste of dirt lingered. Assessments of the health effects are mixed. Dirt can contain deadly parasites or toxins, but it can also strengthen the immunity of fetuses in the womb to certain diseases, said Gerald N. Callahan, an immunology professor at Colorado State University who has studied geophagy, the scientific name for dirt-eating. Haitian doctors say depending on the cookies for sustenance risks malnutrition.”⁴

• Education: “Of Haiti's 8.7 million inhabitants, just below half are illiterate. The literacy rate of 52.9% is the lowest in the region. Haiti counts 15,200 primary schools, of which 90% are non-public and managed by the communities, religious organizations or NGOs.[7] The enrollment rate for primary school is 67%, of which less than 30% reach 6th grade. Secondary schools enroll 20% of eligible-age children.” ⁵

• Medical care: “As of 1999, there were an estimated 0.2 physicians and 0.7 hospital beds per 1000 people. … Tuberculosis has long been a serious health problem. … Malnutrition and gastrointestinal diseases are responsible for more than half of all deaths. … Children may receive vaccinations, but the statistics are very low … tuberculosis 40%, diphtheria, pertussis, and tetanus, 35%; polio, 32%; and measles, 30%.” ⁶

• Housing: In the countryside in Haiti, “housing facilities are generally primitive and almost universally without sanitation. Wooden huts are the prevalent standard … with 6.1 people per dwelling.” ⁷ The population density in the capital city's largest slum is among the highest in the world. As many as 1,500 people live on every two acres of land in Cite Soleil and other shantytowns. Conditions are so crowded that many dwellers pay to sleep in shifts. Mothers and fathers often sleep standing up in shacks that have less than 8 square feet of space for 10 or 12 people. ⁸

So, with this knowledge and perspective, what do you say to that? I'd love to hear your comments. My immediate thought, and my thought still to this day, is, "How self-centered!" I struggle with how to help this individual and their family, without further aiding the self-centeredness. Don't get me wrong - I too am self-centered. I too take many things for granted. It comes as a product of growing up and living in this society. We live in a nice, well-furnished home, in a safe neighborhood. We've got a well-stocked refrigerator and pantry, and clean water that flows from the faucets. We both have good jobs, and my child is well-cared-for while we are away from her. She will be attending a local public school next year. We have doctors that we visit regularly for preventative care, and whenever we are sick or injured, we have the care that we need very close to our home. If we have a medical emergency, it is against the law for a medical professional to deny the care that is needed.

I have a long way to go, but I am learning just how much we have here, and how much I could help others given our situation of plenty. I have some priorities that have definitely shifted in the past year, and more that are due for some shifting. I just ask you, are there some areas of your life that need changes? How can you lead a more God-centered life, rather than a self-centered life? Most of you that read my blog are doing this, and I thank you for that. I thank you for all that you are doing all around you. I just pray that I can do more. I pray for God's guidance in my life. I pray that I can be a better witness of my experiences and the knowledge I've gained. I pray for others that need God in their lives, so that they too can experience the life-changing hope in tomorrow, and not dwell in their own self-centered ways.